1 00:00:18,625 --> 00:00:20,416 Every time I want to photograph something 2 00:00:20,416 --> 00:00:22,375 I have to get rid of another image, 3 00:00:23,208 --> 00:00:25,166 because my memory has been full for months... 4 00:00:26,041 --> 00:00:28,500 Full of stupid things. 5 00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:30,916 The last thing, a fan in the trash, 6 00:00:31,833 --> 00:00:34,250 and I think it's reached a point where... 7 00:00:34,791 --> 00:00:36,708 Where I've lost my judgment a little bit. 8 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:41,291 I already got rid of things that I now know I cared about, 9 00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:43,458 but at the time I... 10 00:00:43,458 --> 00:00:45,625 I wasn't able to distinguish their value, 11 00:00:46,666 --> 00:00:48,833 and I think that's why I'm now afraid of deleting pictures... 12 00:00:50,291 --> 00:00:53,625 Also because, somehow, by not having them, 13 00:00:53,625 --> 00:00:55,958 I kind of made other types of connections, 14 00:00:56,458 --> 00:00:58,000 and images that I didn't care about before, 15 00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,250 are now a fundamental part of my memory. 16 00:01:01,791 --> 00:01:05,541 I mean, It is as if with some of those photos I could fill the blank spaces of the others. 17 00:01:18,375 --> 00:01:21,500 For example, the last thing I have from Galicia 18 00:01:21,500 --> 00:01:24,208 are some photos of the sky that I took from my house. 19 00:01:25,416 --> 00:01:27,708 Three almost identical pictures. 20 00:01:29,250 --> 00:01:32,250 And the first one I have from here, from Madrid, is also of the sky, 21 00:01:32,416 --> 00:01:34,208 a couple of days after arriving. 22 00:01:34,875 --> 00:01:37,416 In between, total white. 23 00:01:38,541 --> 00:01:40,750 It's almost like I knew I was going to miss it, 24 00:01:40,750 --> 00:01:44,125 or at least that's the way I interpret it now. 25 00:01:44,125 --> 00:01:47,000 Because at the time I was dying to come, but... 26 00:01:48,041 --> 00:01:50,041 But I missed home quite a bit. 27 00:01:51,416 --> 00:01:53,416 It's the same with everything I've lived with Ana. 28 00:01:54,083 --> 00:01:58,250 "Hello, excuse me, have you seen Ana Cmps?" 29 00:01:59,500 --> 00:02:00,708 "It's me" 30 00:02:05,291 --> 00:02:10,625 During this time we cried, we laughed, we told each other the dramas, the joys... 31 00:02:10,625 --> 00:02:14,208 What I mean is that by being roommates we were here together for everything, 32 00:02:14,208 --> 00:02:15,208 the good and the bad, 33 00:02:15,208 --> 00:02:17,333 and our friendship was strengthened a lot. 34 00:02:18,750 --> 00:02:20,500 And it seems like a joke that what I have the most 35 00:02:20,500 --> 00:02:22,208 are videos of us eating cake. 36 00:02:23,166 --> 00:02:24,333 They are all the same. 37 00:02:25,500 --> 00:02:27,833 Maybe when we are no longer in Madrid 38 00:02:27,833 --> 00:02:30,166 it will be something we miss too, 39 00:02:30,500 --> 00:02:32,833 like the sky in my house, but now... 40 00:02:33,541 --> 00:02:35,541 It's something I don't understand. 41 00:02:36,833 --> 00:02:38,833 And the same with everything I lived here, 42 00:02:39,166 --> 00:02:41,750 the people I met, the experiences I had... 43 00:02:43,250 --> 00:02:46,958 I feel that I could have some of that in my gallery but I don't have anything important, 44 00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:50,041 and what I had, I don't have anymore. 45 00:02:59,250 --> 00:03:01,833 All of this is what I thought about when I returned home for Christmas, 46 00:03:01,833 --> 00:03:05,333 because I found an old photo of my parents in my gallery. 47 00:03:06,333 --> 00:03:09,833 They must have been I don't know, about twenty years old, 48 00:03:10,208 --> 00:03:14,125 and if I rummage a little in the past I can almost reconstruct their history together. 49 00:03:16,583 --> 00:03:18,750 That boy and that girl who... 50 00:03:19,875 --> 00:03:21,250 little by little, 51 00:03:21,583 --> 00:03:22,958 without realizing it, 52 00:03:23,166 --> 00:03:24,541 started to love each other. 53 00:03:26,750 --> 00:03:28,750 Time passes very quickly 54 00:03:28,750 --> 00:03:33,250 and I suppose that they stayed together almost naturally, 55 00:03:33,250 --> 00:03:35,833 then one day my sister arrived, then me... 56 00:03:36,208 --> 00:03:39,208 And forty years later they are still there, 57 00:03:39,458 --> 00:03:40,791 together. 58 00:03:42,208 --> 00:03:45,333 It is nice to be able to see these images now, 59 00:03:45,708 --> 00:03:47,083 because without them, who knows, 60 00:03:47,083 --> 00:03:50,541 maybe I would never get to know their story. 61 00:03:51,666 --> 00:03:53,000 However, 62 00:03:53,416 --> 00:03:55,125 what can I reconstruct? 63 00:03:56,750 --> 00:03:59,500 "The image has been removed. You cannot recover this file" 64 00:04:00,083 --> 00:04:02,416 These are the last pictures I took with Luna. 65 00:04:03,250 --> 00:04:06,375 I will call her that, like Siminiani does in his film, 66 00:04:06,375 --> 00:04:07,416 in "Mapa". 67 00:04:08,333 --> 00:04:10,500 I met her shortly after arriving in Madrid 68 00:04:10,500 --> 00:04:13,375 and our story, if you can call it that, 69 00:04:13,375 --> 00:04:15,000 was quite brief. 70 00:04:16,291 --> 00:04:18,166 We met a couple of times and one day, 71 00:04:18,166 --> 00:04:19,625 coming back from the cinema, 72 00:04:19,791 --> 00:04:23,166 we hugged at the subway stop and we never saw each other again. 73 00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:27,916 For me what I experienced was something very deep, 74 00:04:28,416 --> 00:04:30,166 but I don't know how it was for her. 75 00:04:31,250 --> 00:04:33,416 Although that's something I know now that some time has passed 76 00:04:33,416 --> 00:04:34,958 because at that moment, 77 00:04:35,208 --> 00:04:37,583 it was all very fast. 78 00:04:37,958 --> 00:04:42,083 I didn't know what I was feeling and I even tried to convince myself that I didn't feel anything at all. 79 00:04:44,541 --> 00:04:47,166 In the middle of all this self-sabotage 80 00:04:47,166 --> 00:04:49,875 and needing free space on my cell phone, 81 00:04:50,708 --> 00:04:54,916 I ended up having some pictures of a fan in the trash instead of our pictures together. 82 00:04:56,583 --> 00:04:59,583 I think that my fear of deleting comes from that, 83 00:05:00,083 --> 00:05:02,416 because I look at my parents' picture and in it, 84 00:05:02,416 --> 00:05:04,458 I see one of those photos I no longer have with Luna. 85 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:07,625 But now I'm not even sure if all that was real anymore, 86 00:05:07,625 --> 00:05:10,833 or if it was as I remember it now, 87 00:05:11,208 --> 00:05:14,916 because maybe all these sensations belong, I don't know... 88 00:05:15,208 --> 00:05:17,708 To other people, or to other stories, 89 00:05:17,958 --> 00:05:20,791 of those that I have been almost stealing from one place or another, 90 00:05:21,333 --> 00:05:24,166 and that somehow maybe led me to recreate all this... 91 00:05:24,791 --> 00:05:26,416 Or maybe not. 92 00:05:29,333 --> 00:05:30,583 It's just that, without an archive, 93 00:05:30,583 --> 00:05:33,625 every time I search in my memory I have to trust 94 00:05:33,625 --> 00:05:35,291 that it's the way it really was. 95 00:05:35,958 --> 00:05:37,500 I have to trust that 96 00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:39,166 the place I'm looking at 97 00:05:39,750 --> 00:05:41,833 will be the same today as tomorrow, 98 00:05:41,833 --> 00:05:46,375 or in a couple of weeks, months or even years. 99 00:05:50,083 --> 00:05:52,958 I start to think about it and it's not only that, 100 00:05:53,250 --> 00:05:57,541 but my file only has value through me. 101 00:05:58,625 --> 00:06:01,250 By itself it is nothing, it says nothing. 102 00:06:02,166 --> 00:06:04,083 If I don't interpret it... I mean, 103 00:06:04,083 --> 00:06:05,416 what's its meaning? 104 00:06:06,083 --> 00:06:08,000 It's not like my parents' photo album, 105 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:11,583 where each image is made to immortalize a specific moment. 106 00:06:13,958 --> 00:06:16,750 My gallery is a complete mess. 107 00:06:17,500 --> 00:06:20,541 It's not a space where I can show someone like 108 00:06:20,541 --> 00:06:22,958 "look, this is my life". 109 00:06:24,666 --> 00:06:26,125 I simply have moments, 110 00:06:26,125 --> 00:06:28,875 moments that I associate with sensations, 111 00:06:29,875 --> 00:06:32,125 meaning, the image has value for what appears in it, 112 00:06:32,125 --> 00:06:34,375 but also for what I live with it. 113 00:06:37,708 --> 00:06:41,166 For example, in the summer a comet could be seen with the naked eye in the sky, 114 00:06:41,166 --> 00:06:43,958 which will not pass again for another 7,000 years. 115 00:06:45,250 --> 00:06:48,833 While it could be seen, I went every night to see it with my parents 116 00:06:48,833 --> 00:06:52,000 and it was something that really united us a lot, 117 00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:54,791 because I came to Madrid right after. 118 00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:58,708 I don't have any photos of it, 119 00:06:59,166 --> 00:07:01,291 but come on, there must be thousands of them. 120 00:07:02,416 --> 00:07:05,750 For me, in addition to that scientific value, 121 00:07:05,750 --> 00:07:07,458 it has an added value, 122 00:07:07,708 --> 00:07:10,500 which connects me directly with my home and my parents, 123 00:07:10,500 --> 00:07:12,791 and that can only be known through me. 124 00:07:14,250 --> 00:07:17,916 Memories are images, but they are also more than that. 125 00:07:18,375 --> 00:07:20,916 And by that I mean that when we experience things, 126 00:07:21,083 --> 00:07:23,833 I think we are not being fully objective, 127 00:07:24,458 --> 00:07:27,375 so if the memory becomes fuzzy I don't know if that matters either. 128 00:07:29,250 --> 00:07:31,166 Obviously an image helps to remember, 129 00:07:31,166 --> 00:07:33,541 and it's nice to turn to them in the future, but anyway, 130 00:07:34,250 --> 00:07:36,916 as long as there's someone who can invoke them, 131 00:07:36,916 --> 00:07:39,041 one way or another, 132 00:07:39,791 --> 00:07:41,625 those memories will be back there again, 133 00:07:42,375 --> 00:07:44,791 and that, at least for me, 134 00:07:44,791 --> 00:07:47,291 is what I really want to keep. 135 00:07:48,541 --> 00:07:51,333 A fan, eating cake or a comet passing by, 136 00:07:51,333 --> 00:07:53,416 deep down I don't care so much, 137 00:07:53,833 --> 00:07:56,541 and if thanks to that I can remember other things, 138 00:07:56,833 --> 00:08:00,041 what I felt, my new stage in Madrid, my parents... 139 00:08:00,833 --> 00:08:02,833 Well, I guess they are welcome. 140 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:04,875 But... 141 00:08:05,416 --> 00:08:08,875 Despite all this, the problem remains. 142 00:08:09,958 --> 00:08:11,041 Whatever I do, 143 00:08:11,041 --> 00:08:14,833 everything that I have in my gallery today might be what I end up erasing tomorrow, 144 00:08:15,500 --> 00:08:19,958 and just like that some memories will come and others will start disappearing, 145 00:08:21,333 --> 00:08:23,750 and the memory will still be full 146 00:08:24,125 --> 00:08:27,166 and I still won’t know what to erase.