- Do you ever feel like a plastic bag
drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?
Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin
And then… well, the rest of the lyrics weren't that interesting
But this phrase was the one stuck in my brain
since always.
I was thinking about it the other day.
It was Thursday and I saw “Honey, I Shrunk the Kids”
- Wow.
- What? - Great! Super!
- Wayne Szalinski is a 20th century’s character.
A synthesis of the american family from a father’s perspective:
all that matters is your work.
You see, the rest of the American families have to hide the regret of raising a family profesional sin embargo tenía que ocultar nada Lo único que hace es automatizar los procesos de la familia en una serie de máquinas la que le avisa del desayuno la que le ha puesto al perro para
and what they really wanted was to focus on their professional life, profesional sin embargo tenía que ocultar nada
however, Wayne Szalinski had nothing to hide.
What he does is automatize the family's routine with a bunch of machines:
The one that calls for breakfast, the one that helps the dog to serve his own food,
there is a little trinket that hangs out the phone with a don't disturb message
and then, when he shrinks the kids,
the only things that matters is that the machine works.
The kids could live or die… bah, it's just incidental.
- A stupid bad commercial movie.
- Not every donkey gets it.
- I think we should go.
- What's going on? Are you sick?
- I think we’re on a low budget shortfilm. un corto abajo presupuesto mira tu alrededor Mira la iluminación somos dos personas hablando en un restaurante en el que probablemente les hayan dejado rodar porque el director es pobre pero Majo es el típico lugar común es el ABC del director de cine sin dinero Tú me dijiste que la idea de mi corta era un quiché claro se levanta se viste y se va a trabajar es el típico cliché del que quiere estudiar cine pero este clichés es diferente es el del que sabe que rodar cuesta dinero y como no lo tiene Baja sus expectativas Tenemos que irnos Ariel Termina de comer y nos vamos solo no puede ser que estemos exagerando un poquito Mírame no estoy fuera de foco
- A low budget short?
- Look around, look at the lighting.
We are two people talking at a restorant
where they probably let them film
because the director is poor but cool.
It is the typical story, is the ABC of the movie director with no money.
- You told me that the idea of my short film was a cliche.
- Of course: it's the idea of the guy that gets up, dresses up, and goes to work estudiar cine pero este clichés es diferente es el del que sabe que rodar cuesta dinero y como no lo tiene Baja sus expectati
is the typical cliche of someone who wants to study cinema.
This one is different: is the one that knows that filming costs money,
money he does not have, and lowers his expectations.
We have to go, Ariel, Finnish your meal and we leave.
- Or maybe we’re exaggerating a little bit?
- Look at me, aren’t I out of focus?
- No, you look fine to me.
- Well, it’s a common mistake.
- How are we doing over here? Dudes, eh?
- We’re fine, thanks.
- Would you like something else? Coffee? Tea?
We have a coffee machine that makes great... coffees. haciendo café
- Can you bring us the check? We got to go.
- Right away, I’ll bring your check!
- Why did you do that?
Did it occur to you that I might like to have some of that great coffee?
- Didn't you see? that guy is an awful actor!
Surely it’s a director’s friend
or a waiter that was hired in the last minute.
- Look. - What?
The wine bottle was full a minute ago and now it’s almost empty.
An obvious lack of continuity.
- Well, I mean... you were drinking, right?
Maybe this is something that is getting out of hands...
- Look! Look!
- Look at you. - What?
- You are out of focus! You look out of focus!
I’m sure it was a bad take,
and on a low budget they couldn’t redo the take because they didn’t had enough time.
You see now why do we have to leave?
- No, I don’t see it.
- How you don't see it? its a low budget short...
- Yeah, I know: I know it’s a low budget short film, so what?
Why can't we have dinner here?
- I’m sure they didn’t had budget for outdoor takes
and it's all done in one location.
- I still don’t see the problem.
- These films are unbearable, Ariel, I mean, at the end...
It's always some guy's dreams or the typical murder plans to steal somebody's fortune
or... or it’s about someone...
who wants to break up a relationship…
¿Ariel?
- What?
- You want to go out with me, right?
- I think that...
I'd like to have more me time.
- Are you expecting me to say something?
- I don’t know what to say.
- I can’t belive this.
- I've been thinking about it.
That’s why I couldn't write
and when you asked me if something was wrong I told you we could talk later.
Didn't you see the signs?
- Well, no. I truly didn’t.
- I didn’t wanted to go to your place and end up having sex...
So I thought it was better to come to…
- To come and break up with me in a low budget short film.
- What?
- To expose us to this shit show
for the 32 viewers of the director’s Vimeo and make them witness of our miseries!
- Are you being serious?
It bothers you that we are breaking up
or that we’re doing it in low budget film?
- It bothers me the humiliation that you expect me to endure, Ariel,
There are other ways to do these things.
- And how would I know that this will end up being a low budget film?
- Well, here’s the check.
Are you sure you don't want coffee?
- Can’t you see that this is a private conversation?
Why don't you go and do some voice overs or something?
- Doing voice overs...
I... I’m not good at impro, I’m sorry.
- Why do you have to be so mean to people?
- Don't change the subject.
- No! I'm not changing the subject! It’s all about the same thing!
You always think that you are better than anyone else!
You think that all the movies sucks, you don't want to go out to new places,
All you do is complain! Complain! Complain!
- Well, Excuse me for not fulfilling your super complacent exceptions
but I never thought that someone...
Fuck, Line!
- Ok, Excuse me for not fulfilling your super complacent exceptions,
I never thought that someone could be complacent
- and have expectations at the same time. - Ok.
- But, Oh! Surprise! Here you are.
- Ok, ok, I’ve got it.
- Very well, Excuse me for not fulfilling your super complacent exceptions
I never thought that someone could be complacent and have expectations at the same time,
but, Oh! Surprise! Here you are.
- Are you done?
- Yes.
- You got something right: this script is bullshit.
- But the script does not have to be bullshit, Ariel.
We could talk about this in another place,
We could talk about this on a mountain top
or in a set full of extras that a low budget film can't afford.
Let’s have a real conversation.
- The problem is that we have nothing else to talk about.
Besides, more money does not make a better script.
It's not the location... It doesn't matter who the actors are,
it's not the money behind it... if the story is always the same.
- I tought this was going to last longer.
- What? The short or our relationship?
- I don’t know. Eighter.
- I’m sorry it ended like this.
- You can go.
(Romantic song playing)
- Really? I mean, you had no money to pay for the original Alex Ubago song
and you downloaded the one with no copyrights?
Fucking shit!